Phil's Confessional

[Phil]

Aight, the plan as far as I know is that the vote will be split 3-3 (Jacob - Jimmy). The more I think about it, the more I'm actually willing to go to rocks. I know I said in my previous confessional that we should just get rid of Jacob, but also I think again about how it's probably not imperative he go. Like I said, I actually want Cole to go (lolz, even though I do like him and I don't think he comin after me right now, I'm just sayin). Also I don't know how much I'd care if E went in a rock draw either, HEH. Same for James for that matter. I DON'T EVEN KNOW HOW MUCH I'D CARE IF *I* GO IN A ROCK DRAW TBH. Like, coming into this swapped tribe, I immediately wanted to work with Jimmy and Jacob, because tbh I like them both. So ironically, if we go to rocks, we'd actually keep those two safe and it's just a matter of me going to rocks with 3 people I don't reaaaaaaaallllly mind if they go.

People are always talking about how like, Jimmy doesn't have anyone else. I dunno how true that is for Jacob even, but I think Jacob always somewhat of a wildcard/toss up. Like, I was talking to Ashley and Ashley wants Jacob out, but it lowkey made me want to keep Jacob more, cuz I swear I just keep wanting to keep people who aren't tied to some larger alliances ----- as I get wrapped up more and more into said alliance tbqh, but shh. Honestly in my head it kinda sucks that Me/Jacob/Jimmy aren't working together. But also I never talk game with Jacob so tbh I don't actually know where his allegiances are. And voting against him doesn't really help, except for if I swing it that I didn't mind tying it up to make Jacob/Jimmy safe and risk going to rocks to get out someone else. I dunno what explanation will fly afterwards, but I spose I gotta think of something fast.

It feels super weird straight up lying to Cole/James/Jacob and then somehow expecting things to not be awful later. Because if I'm somehow on the wrong side of the vote, revote, or rock draw, it could be terrible for me.

There's also the scenario that James/Jacob/Cole are lying to me about the vote and the vote is actually for E and not for Jimmy. And if they're lying then obviously I have free reign to do whatever the f*ck I want and not feel bad lol.

[Phil]

Tribal Council #8

[Jacob]

#YOLO I'm hoping for some sort of tie just to shake things up and see what people do. I'm here for information and I'm willing to put my own a** on the line to get it.

[Phil]

Now I think Cole James and Jacob do in fact want to split, since Cole asked me to switch my vote to E. Sorry buddy. The fact that I'm just being asked to do something without mich actual discussion bothers me. Like, James was way better at trying to talk those thjngs through, and j admit I'm the one who backed off of the convo to avoid lying to him too much. I love Cole but I don't really feel that bad lying to him. Like I do a little bit, but yeah I'm gonna force myself not to feel bad haha.

If they're doing the split, then the vote should be 3-2-1 Jacob, Jimmy, E. Yikes. Like even though I'm the one they are relying on to pull through, hopefully E gets more sh*t for this vote hahah. I don't have the time and energy to defend myself. Like I'm sure Cole/James have their doubts. I was minimally committal and somewhat busy (irl too I'm seeing someone now ^_^) so I'm sure they can tell I'm distant and once it's revealed it'll make loads of sense how I was acting.

E says James won't be mad, and I hope he's right. Like I actually do feel bad lying to James.

[Phil]

I f*cking can't with E's shenanigans. This man is wild af.

[Phil]

So, yikes this game is gonna be taxing on me. I was like in various stages of undress as I was hoppin into a hot shower after my night out, when my phone rudely interrupts me and I'm somehow compelled to f*cking sit there on snapchat trying to follow E's shenenigans. LIKE. PEOPLE.BE.SHADY right before Tribal Council and I'm gonna have a hard time staying sane, LMAO.

SO JAMES .... f*cking .... JAMES asks E to hold on to his idol for him. SO E f*ckING MAKES A FAKE a** IDOL TO PASS TO JAMES. AND THEN JAMES IS TELLING *ASHLEY* THAT HE'S GONNA KEEP IT. And meanwhile E is thinking James will play the fake idol on Cole, so E gets his panties in a bunch and wants to switch the vote from Jacob to Cole, WHICH I AM LIKE, SUDDENLY ECSTATIC FOR, BUT ALSO f*ckING MAD AT E FOR NOT AGREEING TO IT EARLIER! LIKE. 10 MINUTES BEFORE THE f*ckING DEADLINE YOU WANNA SWITCH THE GODDAMN f*ckING VOTE TO THE PERSON YOU ACTUALLY WANT TO f*ckING VOTE OUT?

LIKE I WAS ALREADY f*ckING IRRITATED THAT THEY WANTED TO VOTE JACOB, AND I HAD TO SIT THERE FOR A WHILE TRYING TO RATIONALIZE WHY IT WOULD BE A BETTER MOVE TO TAKE OUT JACOB OVER E OR JIMMY. BUT E PUSSIED OUT SEVERAL TIMES DURING THE DAY AND SAID HE DIDN'T WANNA VOTE COLE SO WE f*ckING STUCK WITH f*ckING JACOB WHO I LOWKEY ACTUALLY WANTED TO * F U C K I N G * WORK WITH.

AND THEN AT THE SAME f*ckING TIME, COLE AND JAMES ARE BARELY TALKING A LICK TO ME, AND I DONT WANNA REVEAL MY TRUE TARGET ( C O L E ) TO THEM BECAUSE I KNOW IT WONT FLY AND IT COULD PUT MY a** ON THE LINE. MEANWHILE THEY ARE TRYING TO TARGET MY R I D E O R F U C K I N G D I E J I M M Y and ALL I"M DOING IS TRYING TO SAVE OUR ASSES. I MEAN JACOB WAS THIRD PRIORITY #SORRYBOUTIT

SO THEN WE ARE FACED WITH THE POSSIBILITY OF ACTUALLY VOTING COLE, BUT WE HAVE LIKE 30 MINUTES TO DECIDE, AND SUDDENLY I"M PARANOID AF THAT IT'S GONNA BE A TIE AND THAT JAMES WON'T VOTE OUT COLE OVER JIMMY. SO WE LIKE, OK, LET'S JUST STICK TO THE F U C K I N G PLAN BECAUSE THIS LAST MINUTE sh*t WREAKS HAVOC ON MY BRAIN, ESPECIALLY WHEN I"M LITERALLY STANDING THERE WITH MY d*ck OUT WANTING TO JUST GET IN THE f*ckING S H O W E R ALREADY.

AND THEN.

T H E N

JAMES. JAMES f*ckING MESSAGES ME AT f*ckING 1 1 : 5 6 PMG TELLING ME HE'S ACTUALLY VOTING FOR E BECAUSE HE KNOWS 100% THAT E DOESNT HAVE THE IDOL. AND AT THAT POINT, I"M SCREAMING BECAUSE I'M 100% WANTING TO SWITCH OUR VOTES TO COLE BUT WE DONT HAVE THE TIME BECAUSE JIMMY"S a** IS NOT ON SNAPCHAT WITH US AND HE DIDNT WANNA SWITCH AT LAST SECOND SO WE KEPT WITH JACOB. And the whole while E is barking commands at me telling me to get Jimmy to switch his vote to Cole and I'm like boy, stop, like I'm kinda B U S Y plus like, we have NO TIME. AND THEN E SUDDENLY ALL LIKE, NAH WE CAN VOTE COLE LATER AND I'M LOWKEY SAD ABOUT JACOB BUT ALSO JUST LIKE, OK I ALREADY CONVINCED MYSELF THIS WAS OK SO JUST f*ckING D E A L W I T H I T. So I was committed already so I have to stop being a b*tch because I decided hours ago this was the move.

I'm also serious that I'm still questioning the validity of E's actual idol. Like, a whiles ago Alad told me that E made up a fake PM. Now E's making up fake PMs to give it away. Like is he giving out a fake version of a fake idol? Or a fake version of a real idol? WHO KNOWS but E's making it work tbh. Ashley swears its real, but I'm still skeptical tbh. But Ima stay close to E so that whatever fake/real idol he has, I'm safe.

And now Jacob is messaging me on the side asking me what went wrong and I'm feeling really bad, because like, I straight up backstabbed him for almost no reason. When in reality I wanted to keep his a** at the start of this round LMAO. I obviously went back and forth several times trying to justify his boot, and tbh I think I can live with it, but I'm lowkey pissed we had to go to TC in the first place lolz.

AND THEN STAN. S T A N messages E wondering how E convinced me to vote Jacob, and he's like "glad we have nother person on our side" and I'm like GOD f*ckING DAMMIT I WISH A LA FAMILIA PERSON WENT I'm probably so f*cking stupid that I'm letting La Familia get by when that was my f*cking goal not to let this happen and we could have just f*cking voted someone from La Familia. And why did JoeyOhInactive have to suck so much, LMAO. I wanted someone like, Vova to go, HEH. HEH. HEH. I hate myself for caring.

Now E wants to throw the comp to boot Cole, and in my head i'm like NOPENOPENOPE I'm preeeeeeeeetttty sure E had people throw a comp last season to boot my a**, so I'm like, nah E like this is fun and all but nah, I ain't throwing fr. Like, make someone else's a** go to TC fr stop.

Nah but fr I'm not actually freaking out that much I just wanted to write all that.

[Phil]

EPISODE EIGHT

Yuck these people are such losers and have so much time on their hands to be making up so many stories. Vote me the f*ck outta here already I don't got time for these idiots to be blowing up my phone, stop.

[Phil]

Ok I made a deal with James. I'm still gonna push a Cole vote. Cole might push an E vote to me still. James says he's on board to vote Cole, but I know he super nervous about going to tc again. I'm open to keeping him over E obviously. I just need to give myself the wiggle room to even have that power over here. I needed to take that luxury away from James, sorry.

Jimmy is not so tight with E that he would automatically stick with E forever. If we stuck with E this TC, he might think that we would save him over James and if we had to go to TC again, we could still vote James.

I made the mistake of telling Kaitlyn k wanted to vote James, which was partially true but I guess not my immmediate plan.

I AM however still annoyed I'm not getting the full idol story from James so that makes me think he's not being honest. But I also can't believe everything E says. I'm still sitting on a few questions I want James to clear up, but I offered him a deal to work together this TC and next TC and into the merge.

Like I'm trying a power grab and I hope it works. I'd throw E under the bus if it meant saving me and Jimmy. I'd even save James over E if that gives me more options at the merge, which I think it does.

I already know people want to vote out E, so I'm not worried about that. I am already sick of working with E though and it's only been one round. Tbh I hope he thinks I will stick with him, and I plan to make him beleive that, and make others believe it enough so that e doesn't get any conflicting outside info about me.

I'm gonna get more and more paranoid about E though, and weather his stories are true and whether he's gonna screw me like he did in the past. So hopefully by making sure I'm good with James (and confirming that with outside ppl like Kaitlyn, don, etc) that it will help me survive this tribe, even if E tries something crazy.

[Phil]

I'm voting out Cole and I don't care if I'm a liar for it lmfao

I also don't care if I'm getting f*cked by this. 😂

Also I might change my vote lmaooooo

[Phil]

So apparently James had shared a screenshot of a conversation I had with him telling him I'd choose to vote out Cole over E. I had made sure to keep myself on record that I was not gonna vote E, because I didn't want that coming back to E's paranoid a**. I know people share screenshots all the time, so I wanted to make sure one never got back to E, cuz I been relying on E to keep my safe af.

Anyway, Ashley was the one who shared the screenshot to me, shortly after I had talked to James the morning before Tribal Council. I was still in my bed and was kinda groggy during my whole conversation between James and Kaitlyn, so I thought the screenshot was from that morning after I talked to James to corroborate E's story (which apparently got wrong anyway. More on that later maybe). Anyway, so Kaitlyn was up on my a** basically threatening me, telling me that she will be pissed if I vote Cole, so I quickly backtracked and told her that I wasn't voting for her ... yet. I basically tried to throw it back on James, saying that I said Cole's name to James because James told E that we were voting Cole. Or something like that. So I threw Cole's name out to James to make sure he was telling me the truth about who the vote was going to be for: Cole. So, that was a true story, and yes, James was telling me the truth at that point. What I DIDN'T realize was that the screenshot was from THE DAY BEFORE, and that I had indeed brought up Cole's name before this morning. But I didn't realize that until after Cole himself threw that screenshot in my face like 10 hours later, as if that was gonna scare me. 

Like this boy throws that screenshot to me, and also a bunch of other screenshots at me, asking why I been shady all day, like WTF have you been messaging me at all? I had like two total conversations where I said your name. Otherwise I been living my grown a** life doing sh*t, not patrolling messages or coddling you telling you you will be okay. Like, I don't get why he thinks we're supposed to be these great allies when he literally doesn't tell me sh*t? He sent Kaitlyn to lecture me about how awful E is. Like, stop.

Anyway, so I get a minute before I'm done with work and I basically sass his a** out over text to tell him what I have and haven't been doing, and why his f*ckin name came outta my mouth. Meanwhile, he trying to call me out in front of the #b*tches snap-group, and the only person I actually care about being called out of in front of is maybe Ashley, but ASHLEY IS f*ckING IN ON THE STORY ABOUT HOW COLE IS GONNA USE A f*ckING FAKE IDOL TO TRY TO IDOL OUT E. So IDGAF if he tries to call me out, so I call his a** out about creating a snap group with E and James. IF WE SUCH GOOD ALLIES WHY THE f*ck YOU BE DOING THIS WITHOUT LETTING ME KNOW. STOP GUILT TRIPPING ME AND DOING sh*t BEHIND MY BACK, > > > ! ! ! H Y P O C R I T E ! ! ! < < <

On top of that, this man is sharing screenshots of his idol guesses to try to convince my a** that he doesn't have the idol, when I already know the whole story about how James is giving Cole a fake idol. So he tryna convince me he has no idol, knowingly withholding information from me (as always) since we are such good friends and allies. So who gonna be mad when I vote for him and he go after playing a fake idol? NOT ME. And honestly between Me E and James, I ain't even doing the baddest sh*t, so if Kaitlyn wants to come at my a**, I'll drag her BYEEEEEE. Anyway, but nah she prob won't stay mad at me, I hope lolzies.

Anyway, so I go the whole day and James comes to me like "should I give Cole the fake idol?" and in my head I'm like YIKES JUST SAY YOU DID IT CUZ YOU PROB ALREADY DID LOL. Then for a hot minute I think he wants to vote E, and I'm like, eek we can't have these back and forths. But then I'm talking to Alad outta the blue, cuz I forget what happened, but maybe I get paranoid that James not voting with us or something, I'm not sure* But anyway, I'm talking to Alad and suddenly he says we should get James out. Like he says, don't vote E, Cole unpredictable, but get James out first. And I'm like :thinking: rq because James was being shady and tbh I could get him out rn if I wanted, but I didn't really want to. But then suddenly Alad also talking to E and E get all excited about possibly voting out James, but then I'm like, HMMM I dunno. This man might actually be on our side this vote, he seems actually genuine now. So E like "go post in our chat with Jimmy asking if he wants to vote James" and I'm like, OH HELL NO WHY I GOTTA POST. NO SCREENSHOTS THO, STOP. So I actually go to the PM and f*cking ask Jimmy if he wants to vote James, and then E's like "Nah nevermind we can vote Cole" and LMAO he did the same sh*t last time. Motherf*cker changing his mind, getting me to post something so he can screenshot it later. b*tch STOP. Anyway, so the vote to flip on James is foiled, then back on, then foiled again .... all by E. 

Anyway, basically the vote for Cole goes off without a hitch, even though I was nervous af cuz it was super awkward leading up to the votes, and so eerily silent. But Cole goes in a rather anticlimactic way (he was the only one blindsided, and he'll prob argue that he knew). Maybe the viewers got a kick out of it, I don't know. But E is for Extra and he made James have a fake fight with him on the board. WHY DO WE INDULGE E IN HIS STUPID FORUM GAME FANTASIES LMAO THIS MAN IS DUMB AF.

*OH YA its because James was highkey still tryna get Jimmy out. UNLESS E MADE THAT ALL UP. Anyway, I confronted Cole about that and he didn't deny the group existing, and fersure they had to have been talking about getting out Jimmy. And this was after James agreed to vote Cole, so I'm like THIS MAN IS NOT TRYING TO GET COLE OUT, THIS MAN IS TRYING TO GET JIMMY OUT. Anyway, so I was paranoid af for some reason which is why I went to talk to Alad who I know is pretty straight up with me and gives me information I need lol. 

[Phil]

EPISODE NINE

Alright guys, I should have written a long confessional yesterday, because already so much sh*t was going down, so this might be a long one.

The Quasi Merge Twist: Anyway, right away it's announced that there's a TWIST and that we will compete individually but that we will have to go to TC all together, but that we're NOT merging and we'll still be in the tribal phase. Honestly, I don't know if we're going back to our old tribes, or if we'll be split into new tribes. Maybe Nate said in his write up, but do I read what Nate says?

Anyway, so immediately people are just starting to go on the offensive, and basically I'm going on the defensive. I realize right away that Khori needs to stick together. Like, I think it is imperative for my game that no one from Khori get voted out in this Tribal Council. Honestly, I could survive a Tribal Council with me/Jimmy/James, and even Me/E/Jimmy, but I'd be FREAKING if it was Me/E/James. Like, YIKES, even though I would survive cuz E would have to side with me. Just that those two are scary af on their own, but together they're a whole new breed of insanity. 

Anyway, so with that mission in mind, it quickly becomes clear that like, every single Khori member (except me?) has their name brought up. And I'm like shiiiit I need to just defend all these people. The main targets seemed to be E and James, but with Jimmy thrown in there in case of idol/immunity. On the other side, the targets were Stan/Briq (with I dunno who as a third option). So immediately the sides are tryng to jockey for people to bring over, and I can feel the heat right away. 

I'm basically solidifying myself with the "E" camp. My loyalties here are to Jimmy first and foremost (but more on that later, yikes), Alad, Ashley, E, Don, and Jhon. What a rag tag group, but maybe not really lmao. So I've been having lowkey strategy sessions with Jhon basically all game. Like he is my ticket to Briq/Stan, and I'm his ticket to myself to give info to Briq/Stan (lets be real, lol). So I mean everything I say to Jhon, I figure will eventually filter back to Briq somehow. But anyway, Briq also approaches me pretty early on basically saying that if I wanted to take a shot at someone from Jakkal, he would be open to hearing me out for options. I'm highkey suspicious, but I take that proposition into account (because it becomes hella relevant later). 

Now, here's the thing with that proposition. He would only agree to it probably if I were to say that I'd wanna target like, Don or Alad (even though Briq claimed to be working with Alad and that they were "cool"). But they way he was talking about Alad made it seem kinda not. He kinda threw him under the bus and said some negative things about him to me. I didn't really react, so it's whatever. But mental note taken. See, I originally wanted to take a shot at Jakkal, because I know Don/Alad were freaking out about being on that tribe. And Don told me that he thinks he can survive one TC, but not two. So it makes me think that maybe Ym or Alad would be targetted first, then Don second. I DUNNO. But what really got me thinking (and I've been thinking about this for a whiiille) is how does YM fit into all this. Is YM cool with Briq/Stan/Jhon or nah. I think YM is tight with Stan, so automatically I'm assuming he'll go with the three and target DonAlad if Jakkal were to lose. But then Briq kinda mentions how he's "cool" with YM too but then took it back kinda right away and said that Ym made a fourway chat between Stan/Don/Alad, so he guesses they're not cool. But then I remember that three days ago Jhon literally told me that YM was probably gonna be the first person voted out of Jakkal, so :thinking : thinking my wheels are churning. At this point, I'm thinking maybe I can get Briq to turn on YM. But then I'm like, sh*t if YM goes, then Stan/Briq/Jhon have a majority, so I'm like abort thoughts. HAH. But another mental note taken.

Meanwhile, I'm actually also talking to Jimmy about my conversation with Briq, because Briq straight up said that he wanted to work with me, him, jhon, and jimmy, and get old Khori back together. So like, as I'm talking to Briq, I'm kinda relaying information to Jimmy to get his thoughts. I don't think that I mentioned that I wanted to straight up target YM, but I hinted that maybe Briq would go for it, cuz um, I mean I think it's true. And i highkey want Briq to target YM, but I can't mention it first. So I'm lowkey hoping Jhon will. 

But anyway, early early early early on in the game I had talked to Jhon about how we both wanted YM out early. so I figured if I can be stubborn about the votes against any of Khori tribe members, he might look for an irrelevant to target, so if so Ima make that be YM, heh. I actually told Jhon that of the four names that had been brought up at this point (Briq/Stan/James/E) that I would prefer to vote Stan. I know his a** don't want to, but I say it anyway. At this point Jhon actually opens up to me about sh*t, and I again straight up told him why I didn't want to vote Khori. Then he told me that he didn't want to target Stan or Briq, because he wants to use them as meatshields. But that he doesn't plan on going to the end end with Briq or Stan, because that would be stupid. So at that point, I lay my case that we can just wait until Immunity results, but I made it pretty clear why I wanted the vote to not be E, Jimmy, or James. And I left it at that tbh. I think the only way Jhon/Briq would be able to work with me is if they come up with a different name other than someone from old Khori.

Well, then of course, the next day comes along and people are still on their sh*t feuds or whatever, and it feels like the Tribal Council deadline is looming, but I realized we haven't even completed the IC. E is going while, Stan is going wild, James is going wild, and Briq is not going as wild, but he is also kinda going wild. Basically I spend my next day getting sh*t on Briq/Stan from E, who is sharing screenshots of PMs that Stan is setting up with people and stuff. At one point, Stan/Briq realize that their names are being thrown around like crazy so their play is to approach James/E to make a fourway alliance. E is throwing them under the bus to me and Ashley, and I'm just living my life not really caring.

And then a bunch of other sh*t goes on that I can't remember, but at a certain point I'm like touching base with Don who I haven't talked to a whole lot, and basically he's got a boner for me right now and I hear through Ashley that he wants to work with me, so we texting back and forth and I basically make sure I'm solidified with him. I let Ashley know that I'm tight with Alad, but I know Ashley not, so I know I need to get close to Don too. But I keep close with Alad, so I do the same for Alad and I try to get some information about Vova on the side from Alad and Don, hehehe. Also E is going back and forth about if we should vote Briq, Stan, or James and I'm like STOP E, just stop targeting James. I need James' a** at the next TC like I said. So E, just f*cking stop being wishy washy. And the vote switches to James too during this time, but then Alad is like, nah the vote is back on Briq, and I'm just laughin.  But yeah, during this time I basically solidify myself with Alad and Don on the side. Ashley and E on the side, Ashley on the side. E on the side. James on the side. Jimmy on the side. Jimmy and E on the side. Jhon on the side. So anyway I feel good about how I probably won't be targeted, but I'm still unsure of how the votes will stack up.

Also Ashley and me are kinda freaking out a little bit because we're faced with the decision to betray Briq or E or whatever, because we're both in the middle and everyone's coming to us expecting us to vote with them. So we actually plot privately and say that maybe we should just get an irrelevant out like YM or Alex. BUT THEN WE REMEMBER WE CAN'T GET OUT YM because we have to protect DonAlad from Jakkal. So we :think :think :think maybe we can get out Alex. But like, Alex is not my territory. I don't f*ck with Alex, I don't know Alex, so I dunno. Anyway, nothing comes of that anyway. 

Immunity Challenge: The Immunity Challenge wraps up and I somehow win, #YOLO. I somehow win even though I can't name movies, I named Australian cities in a U.S cities category, but I apparently know reptiles. So, yikes.  Initially I get a score of zero, but then I'm like nah, I know I got more than zero. Turns out I f*ckin won and Nate was all pissed awf cuz I hate instructions. I apologize profusely to everyone especially Nate. But I'm suddenly really happy to have immunity because I was actually stressing and was annoyed. Immunity gives me FREEEEDOM! I'm happy James wins immunity, because that's one target I have to stop protecting, lmao. I only need to concentrate on protecting E and Jimmy at this point. E is FREAKING out that James won immunity because it means the target is back on him. And so he's blowing up the snap group between E/Ash/Me, and basically me and Ash tell him to STFU and that we got this covered.

A Blackmail Plan! Then I realize WAIT WE ACTUALLY HAVE THIS COVERED OMG. So I actually put my plan into motion to try to get someone to convince Briq to vote YM. I had been planting the seeds already with several people including Briq/Jhon/Jimmy/Ashley. AND SUDDENLY, it feels like its the time to try to get Stan/Briq to split their votes, or at least get them off of E. So, like, I actually casually bring up YM's name to Jimmy. BUT I DO NOT ASK HIM TO APPROACH ANYONE ABOUT VOTING YM. I casually just be like "I wanna lowkey see if they wanna vote YM". AND THEN SUDDENLY JIMMY. f*ckING DEAR INNOCENT (?) JIMMY approaches BRIQ about voting for YM. I .... DIDN'T .... HAVE .... TO .... DO .... ANYTHING. So I'm like YO ASHLEY Jimmy already asked Briq. And we are DYING because suddenly the plan is in motion to trick Briq/Stan/Jhon and whoever else they have that the vote could possibly be for YM. But then somehow we keep the votes on Briq. BUT then the trick is to actually make sure we have the votes for Briq rather than YM. Cuz, like, we don't want YM to go, wtf.  I mean ... I straight up do. But I already said why not. Anyway ... 

So then ASHLEY tells me that ALEX is going around saying that Briq said YM. And I'm like cumming because the YM option is spreading like WILD FIRE. And Ashley has the inside scoop on what people are saying. TBH I'm sitting pretty here, like, yes this is amazing. I can't say anything, because Briq/Jhon already KNOW that I would be "open" to voting for YM. All I need for them to do is approach me saying his name. Then I got screenies. *rubs hands* But then VOVA tells Ashley that he's gonna tell YM that BRIQ told ALEX that we should vote for YM. Or something. The point is, Briq and Alex are involved in spreading YM's name, and I am suddenly freaking out that it will be traced back to Jimmy, so I'm like quick Ashley, convince someone that it was Alex. And boom I think she fires off a few snaps, and hopefully Alex gets blamed for spreading Briq's sh*t around about YM. And not Jimmy. LMAO. 

So... as it stands...YM's name is being thrown around as a fake option. AND THEN f*ckING ... E. STUPID . a** . f*ckING . E ... is like "NOOO WE CAN'T VOTE YM". I"M LIKE b*tch SHUT THE f*ck UP ITS A FAKE SUGGESTION. WHAT WE TELL YOU? SIT YOUR DUMB a** DOWN ASHLEY AND I GOT THIS TC UNDER CONTROL (for now maybe until we dont, but anyway ). Ashley and I are telling E to just STFU for once, like god DAMN. Does this man not understand we're trying to f*cking blackmail Briq right now, and he doesn't even get it, like "No DoNt VoTe Ym I f*ck wIt Ym!" [ugly spongebob meme]

Anyway, so I'm just gonna sit on my hands until someone approaches me to vote YM, heh. OH but then, I have to make sure that Jimmy is fr about voting Briq and not actually voting YM. LMAO. Sometimes I feel like I accidentally neglect Jimmy because so much happens via snapchat and text, but me and Jimmy only talk on PM. So I wanna make sure I'm not sending him mixed signals. So yeah I basically reiterate to him that "they" (meaning Stan/Briq) were throwing out his name as an alternative to E in case E had an idol. I honestly have no idea if this story is true, but I tell it to Jimmy anyway.

I hope to f*ck Jimmy trusts me because I'm doing everything in my power to save him, but also get my way in other game ventures. 

Well, that's pretty much it to be honest. I'm sure I missed a lot but I'll fr forget everything if I don't write it here. Sorry it's so long, but I realized I need my confessionals more for my own personal reference, because for the first time ever, I'm playing this game mostly on Snap Chat, and snaps disappear and I have dementia, remember? (I don't). 

[Phil]

Briq told me that a bunch of people were voting YM. But he seriously just listed like 10 people, which I absolutely don't believe. Like, I know YMs name went like wildfire, but I really don't think 10 people will vote for him. So Ima make sure Jimmy and I are on the same page, because I think he is lowkey trying to work with Jhon too, but hopefully we have made him doubt that it's a good idea to work with Briq/Stan.

But I mean, in the end all I wanted was for Briq to attempt to gather votes for YM to get another person thrown in the mix for fun. That means YMs name is out there with E's so it's not a straight vote between just like 2 or 3 peole. Jimmy used to be on the table but I fr think his name has dropped off. I heard his name in the beginning but now I can't trace who said it lmao.

Also I really hope that Vova told YM about the vote because Briq is relying on Vovas vote apparently. So even if Briq/YM stay, then it creates a little chaos on Jakkal that hopefully will mean Don/Alad are safe if they go to TC.

If Khori goes to TC next, I should be good tbh. Unless I'm reading Jimmy way wrong lmaooo.

[Phil]

I'm voting for Briq because this is what Jimmy and I discussed and I trust Jimmy. As long as I'm on the same page as him tbh I'm fine with whatever happens.

As always, I may change my vote smilesmile.

[Phil]

I'm not hearing anything. Alls I know is Jimmy has been talking to Jhon so I wanna make sure my story the same as Jimmy before I hit up Jhon again. Cuz after I vote Briq, I need to have a story to fall back on so he's not pissed. Ashley been silent all day which is lol whatever, but also Briq said he doesn't know why the girls (Kaitlyn and Ashley) are with E & co. Jimmy say the last he heard from Ash was vote Briq, so he said he gonna do that, and I said yep ok me too, cuz I gotta vote with Jimmy heh.

Watch something happen related to Alex. 👀👀 Or warch E get paranoid and something crazy happen last minute. He's over here having Vova send screenshots to Briq about voting Alex. And how is Briq not gonna go to Alex and get votes on E. I still think they want to split votes between YM and E if they expect us to vote YM lol.

But yeah watch something happen 👀👀

[Phil]

So this whole round was funny because I did not realize that that many people would vote Briq 👀👀👀 lkke even though he was idoled, that's actually amazing. And he got out the person I been wanting out since episode one YM 😂😂😂😂😂😂

😂😂😂😂 and they called us dumb.

Liiiike, I GET that it puts AlaDon in a bad spot on a future Jakkal tc, but they SERIOUSLY didn't think to split votes? Like, what? I deeeeefinitely thought there was a split vote plan and that someone else like Alex was gonna get votes from like Ashley Don and Alad or something. So tbqh this is on them lmao. I did my sh*t, kept Khori in tact, voted with majority, got an idol out, and got one of my targets out.

Like it wasn't perfect cuz I thought Briq going would actually be good, I can't complain...I just voted in a large majority vote at a 15 person TC. Who cares if my vote was nulled? I don't 😂😂😂

I already told Ashley that Jakkal is gonna throw the comp to get out AlaDon... so she better throw to get out Alex. Maybe with both Leeu and Jakkal throwing, Khori actually has a chance. If I could not go to TC for once, and just love my life without talking to these people that would be nice. Soon enough TC gonna be constant so ew.

[Phil]

I'm behind on my confessional for this round but I'm voting for Briq. I talked to everyone but Stan about it heh. And I might be getting votes at least from Stan maybe Briq maybe more but I also don't f*cking care.

[Phil]

EPISODE TEN

I'm writing this retroactively, so deal with it. 

Basically I was annoyed that we had a tribe swap, because I thought that other tribes would be throwing the competition and that I'd finally have immunity and not have to do anything. But then we were swapped, and the swap started going well until we got both Briq and Stan. The only minor complication was Kaitlyn, because I know Kaitlyn wants to be close to Stan (but I guess actually isn't). And also I've always thought that Kaitlyn wanted Jimmy out. But anyway, the swap ended up being good in the end because we got Me/Jimmy/Don/Vova together. Kaitlyn was kinda in the middle. Then there was Briq/Stan who just came out from that last tribal council exposing their idols/fakes/whatever.

Immediately, I made sure I was set with Don, who set me up with Vova. Like, I suddenly felt bad that I had been ignoring Vova, because I realized I needed his a** at this Tribal Council. So I quickly made sure I was good with him, and this was backed up by Don, E, and Alad. Like, E is over here getting all cocky saying that our alliance controls both tribes.

Like, yes I am in an alliance with E, but I don't consider myself very close with Vova or James. Yes, I am in the "Khori Four" alliance with Me, Jimmy, James, and E, but as far as I'm concerned, I'm in a one-on-one alliance with Jimmy, and then I have a side thing going on with E and Ashley. James, I still don't trust, but heh. Vova, I trust but also I see him as a potential roadblock from here on out. But he's aight I guess.

Anyway, E immediately asks me to throw the competition which is ANNOYING AS f*ck TBH because I didn't want to lose the competition and be bothered with going to Tribal Council which I just find annoying. (un)Fortunately(?) I was busy that night and I couldn't compete anyway, so I just had to say f*ck it and let whoever was gonna compete compete. We ended up losing so we had to go to Tribal Council which UGH, zzz ain't nobody got time for that.

I basically just sit on my hands for a while because I can't be f*cked strategizing. We basically set our four against Briq immediately. Me/Jimmy/Don/Vova solid against Briq, so I had to make sure I was good with Kaitlyn. I honestly do feel good with Kaitlyn for the most part, but I just was slightly unsure because of our time apart and my previous vote from Cole. I wanted to make sure she wouldn't try something with Stan, I dunno. E has a LOUD a** MOUTH and has been like pretty open about this "alliance" between Ashley/Don/Me/Alad/E/James/Vova/Jimmy, and I'm like E JUST STFU god we actually understand you don't have to spell it out like okay stop. Plus, it's super loose anyway so stfu. I was slightly paranoid that Kaitlyn would see that and think she's on the bottom, which in my books, she's higher up on my list than some of those people but whatever heh. So ya, I thought Kaitlyn was kinda in the middle so I got a little nervous, but I knew I also needed to just make sure we were on the same page. I think we will be more on the same page during the merge. At least I hope so, so I tried to allude to that a lot without giving up concrete reasons why I think we will be. 

But anyway, the main dish of this episode is how Briq's game just totally and completely unravelled. Like, he had NO LEGS this episode, and it was honestly just more annoying than anything. He approached everyone with kind of the same plan, but offering not concrete suggestions on what to do. In the end, I think he said literally everyone's name except for Stan, so he sort of just solidified everyone's vote against him. Which made me paranoid that they had some idol. And Stan had said my name early on, so I was prepared to have my name written down. I didn't even really try too hard getting my name outta his mouth. I actually decided not to talk to Stan at all. Maybe I was hoping he'd think I had an idol, and would decide to throw his vote elsewhere, I DUNNO. I was busy / lazy, so I just didn't talk to him. Briq, I gave up on because his strategy was so transparent and bad that I just didn't want to deal with it. I mean, without an idol, he actually had no chance. Also he threatened me and said I was gonna get 13th, because I am on the bottom of this tribe. But uh, I am in the majority alliance on this tribe tyvm BYEEEEEE.

Stan campaigned hard for Kaitlyn to throw her vote at me, and thankfully Kaitlyn refused. In the end, Briq was voted out in a 4-1 vote, with me receiving a vote, YAY. No idols were played, and now we're M E R G E D. I'm somehow still alive, lmao. 

[Phil]

EPISODE ELEVEN

So I'm about to lose this game because we're still not merging and we have to stay on dumb tribes that are still small and I won't be able to make the challenge because I'm playing Badlands Tour Guide with friends from home, lolz. Like even if Stan wins, some dumb a** could still pass him an idol maybe.

Also Don said he's tightest with me and Vova, but then Me/Don/Kaitlyn are all apart of this LGA alliance or something, so its like :thinking then when does Don really think about Kaitlyn? And I told him I'm close with Jimmy, because at the start of this current merge phase, we entered Leeu as a voting bloc (Me/Jimmy/Don/Vova). But I'm also close with Kaitlyn. And I thought Kaitlyn/Don were kinda close, but I also know that people have lowkey been trying to split me/Kaitlyn up (like, Alad straight up asked me if I could vote out Kaitlyn, and I said yes, and then E continues to be like 'yo, I know you're friends with Kaitlyn, but you'd never choose her over me, right?" So I gotta be careful and not make it seem like I'd protect tf out of Kaitlyn, but I also lowkey do wanna keep Kaitlyn because I'm pretty sure she'd vote out some people with me at the merge lol. I also know Jimmy and Don aren't suuuuuper close, but we had this voting bloc together that I outlined above. I think that Don-Alad-James-E-Vova are hoping that Me/Jimmy will stick with them but I lowkey want Vova/James out (but not really before people like Stan/Alex). But then I'm always thinking that Kaitlyn might STILL not be thrilled with the idea of voting Stan, but at a certain point, maybe she will have to? I'm not sure. Gotta talk to her too.

I'm just sooo over this Tribal stage.

[Phil]

I missed the challenge because I led a hike in the Badlands and I got a free dinner out of it. No regrets for living my good a** life.

[Phil]

Alright quick update because what the f*ck?

So, I'm minding my own business when I get a snap from E saying that Alad told him that Vova doesn't want Stan out. And I'm like :eyeroll x 50 because, whaaaaat? Like ok, that's fine as long as he doesn't want my a** out, but then E IMMEDIATELY is like "If Vova doesn't want Stan out, get Kaitlyn out". And Im like O_O_O_O_O what. Then he's like "Or get vova out :dead :skull :dead :skull" and then "jk dont"

AND I'M JUST LIKE ! ! ! ! ! ! ! !

E ! ! ! !

What the f*ck?

They totally want to get Kaitlyn out this round, yikes. I DON'T. And they probably know it. In the last few days, they've been straight up making me tell them I'd get Kaitlyn out over them. Like, E's big a** loud mouth has asked me if I would get out Kaitlyn over him, and I said yes, duh. And a few days before that, Alad asked me "ballpark question, would you vote for Kaitlyn", and I said "yes". Like every time they ask me, I just say yes cuz DUH I would say yes.

So, I think they ACTUALLY want to try to get Kaitlyn out now or soon, if E is trying to drop me hints to get out Kaitlyn since Vova doesn't want to get out Stan.

Don and Vova are close. E and Vova are close. I JUST DO NOT TRUST VOVA AND I HAVE ACTUALLY WANTED HIS a** OUT FOR A WHILE.

It's just that ... ugh I also want Stan out. Not cuz I dislike Stan. I JUST .... I just want him out before I make a move against Vova. I just can't make a move against Vova with Stan involved because Stan could so easily just rat me out and EVERYONE would turn on me if I publicly turned on Vova. So I can't say sh*t. I have to keep pretending that I'm blindly following E/Alad/Vova/James/Don or whatever combination of alliance they have.

I am sort of purposely not talking to Stan just to avoid anything getting back to any of the people that could turn on me. So far they're not turning on me, because I think they know they're using me. And its true --- so far.

But like, Vova/James/E need to go. SOON. I think they can go in a merge vote though. Not 100% sure about this vote right now. I think I DO want Stan gone first.

I think I'm gonna straight up approach JM and be kind of cryptic and basically be like "sorry I have been so secretive, but I just have to be careful blah blah blah, I want to work with you at the merge, and believe it or not I want to work with Stan if possible" blah blah blah. Basically use JM as my proxy to talk to Stan, because I think JM will pass messages on to Stan, especially if I hint to JM that I want to work with Stan. But, I actually don't want to work with Stan this vote, and I'd still vote him out. BUT I WOULD ACTUALLY BE WILLING TO WORK WITH STAN AT THE MERGE if that makes any sense, lmao. It's just weird because I wanna work with JM/Joey, but not with Alex/Stan heh. But I need someone to work with who would be willing to counter E/Vova/James with me. Ash would. Jimmy probably would. JM would. Joey would. Kaitlyn would. Don/Alad wouldn't. Alex would, but ugh. I feel bad I just don't wanna start working with Alex, LMAO.

We'll see how the rest of the day pans out, but I still want to straight up target Stan, and then target Vova immediately at the merge. :thinking I dunno how Jimmy/Kaitlyn would feel about working together, but I might try to feel it out.

Actually the more I think about it the more complicated this twist and upcoming(?) merge is gonna be. This is the round to make a move and set your side up better. I just weirdly don't trust the "side" I'm involved with, yet at the same time straight up don't want to work with the other "side". LMFAO I hate myself I should kms.

[Phil]

Also I dunno why I say I'm gonna do all these things because I'm busy af these days and I just have a lot goin on in my life, but suddenly I take a few minutes out of my day at freaking 1 am to write a confessional about all these things I'm gonna do/figure out which I'm totally not gonna do because I won't have time to realistically figure any thing out.